I had a dream this week about websites. That truly is uninspiring and not hardly the essence of beautiful and lovely dreams. Perhaps it was more of a nightmare than a dream. When I woke I had this eerie feeling (well, it is October) about websites and mine more specifically. In the dark dawn of morning I headed into my studio to check out my own blogger website. It felt strangely familiar, yet not so much. First of all, I needed a new password, and I don’t remember ever even needing a password for my blog site. I just automatically logged on. Well, that took a few moments as I had to go back and forth between blogger and email to establish a new password. Then, just like that, I was connected. It looked vaguely familiar, yet oddly, not familiar. As I began to read through my daily blog, I realized my last entry was March 17, 2020. The truth is, I could not believe that. I mean I have kept up this blog for over fifteen years almost on a daily basis. I love my blog site. I post my travel, my stories, my adventures. I post events in town, poetry, opportunities, thoughts (rather deep thoughts), yet here it was staring me right in the face, March 17, 2020. The last entry was the story of Carolyn and me deciding to stay home from ukulele camp as this Covid event was somewhere…doing something. There is a photo of the two of us and how sad we were not to go. It was also light-hearted making light of washing our hands and taking care.
There was no mention of masks, of school closing, of life coming to a standstill. Yet my blog came to a standstill, and I have not thought of it once since that date. That is so odd. I have thought of everything else.
How deeply have we been affected by this virus that I did not notice my outdated blog for over a year and a half? What happened to my own brain…the brain I think is still pretty good. It wasn’t that I came down with the virus. I did not. It wasn’t that my life completely stood still. It did not. But where did the shut down occur, and did this happen to you also? And, if so, how do we come out of this Covid fog all these months later?
I thought I knew all the answers to these questions. I mean, I have been vaccinated and had the booster shot. I had my first house party last week, I teach my classes, I even had some storytelling events. (Okay, not many, but a few live events!)
How long is it before the dark cloud of Covid is finally released? Or, I wonder, will it ever be? Will we be changed forever?
The only actual value I see of the big “P” is that perhaps from now on, when we are sick and around folks, we will wear a mask. To that effect, I have washed all my twenty masks and found a place for them in a dark, distant drawer. Okay, to be honest, a few remain out for trips to town or when friends need the reassurance of a mask to spend some time together. I do try to remember to wear my mask to Aldi’s or CVS or into a restaurant before being seated. I often ask now if a mask is required or preferred. I will, of course, honor that as we move forward.
But now, of course, there is that problem with my blog site. Where do I start? I have taken hundreds of photos, written dozens of columns and stories, and even had as many events in this past year and a half. Do I just start over as if March 17, 2020 were yesterday, and today is mid-October, 2021? Do I make an apology? Will anyone even come back to reading my blog after this hiatus? Or do I just close it out as a fun writing chapter of my life and move on? I mean, I never even missed it or thought about it until my dream this week.
And what about you? What have you totally forgotten about? Is something just now surfacing as some kind of reminder of how it was in the “olden days”?The “olden days” were just a year and a half ago…but oh it does seem so long ago.